|
web information
webmistress
|
 The Fateful Day (We Do Love You, Baby) @ 4/05/2007 10:37:00 AM Don't ask me how I feel because seriously no words can really describe how I feel at this moment or even a few weeks later. I can only say that I am totally depressed to let this thing happen to me.
A week ago, I went for supposingly 'one' ultrasound scan. Not only to determine the gender of my baby where everyone is eager to know, it is also to ensure that my Baby is growing well and receiving nutrients from me. Just a single ultrasound scan leads to a total of SIX scans in total. After the first one, we naively thought we are going to have a mischevious Baby because not only we were not able to find out the gender, we are also not able to see some parts of Baby's organs as it was blocked. Never know we are so stupid! How stupid can we parents be! I guess, we just aren't fit to be parents.
After a total of SIX scans, we knew, it is not simple as A B C. Doctors gave us the worst scenario, and that is we have a very high chance of losing our BABY! NO! I cannot accept this fact! How can that be? My BABY, u know? How can anyone tell me this kind of joke! Seriously, I really do hope this is just a plain silly joke. How I wish, I can just wake up from my dream and then realise it is just one stupidiest joke I had! But I really cannot! I really cannot deceive myself as this is the truth, nothing but the truth!
Doctors advised me to have 2 weeks rest and see if the situation turns for the better. Hopefully with more rest and taking myself off stres from work, it might turn for the better. I really did some serious thinking. My unit is in fact a very small unit. I would say that we are in fact very short-handed but for the sake of my Baby, I applied a week of leave from my boss instead and do hope it turn for the better when I do my next scan.
This fateful day, 04 Apr 2007, it literally mark the end of my Baby's life! I HATE this day!
Being eager parents, we decided to follow my sister-in-law down for her appointment with my OB (She is also pregnant and we are seeing the same OB). My ultrasound scan was actually scheduled in the afternoon. I hope to have a chance to speak to my OB and see if he has anything to advise? Anything to help us, the worrying parents-to-be?
NOPE! He gave us no chance to move. His reply to me was that, for the sake of the baby, proceed for abortion before I am 24th weeks! I HATE HIM! All these while, I tell myself, even if I really have no choice but to give birth out of wedlock, I will never ever ABORT! I have always wanted a happy family picture in my life, just like my own parents. They aren't asking for anything big. Just a family with a few children of their own, a shelter above them, enough to eat, to spend everyday. A perfect life, they will call it. I am only asking for that also. To be happily married, to have my own children, to raise them and to see them grow up while I grow old. Am I asking alot? That is why, I am glad that I am blessed with this little life after we were married for not long but why is my supposingly first child to be taken away from me in such a manner.
Anyway, we have decided to heed the OB's advice. We have agreed to let the Baby leave us first even before Baby is born into the world. According to the OB, we have to be practical as bringing the Baby to the world will bring the Baby more harm. I guess as parents-to-be, we do not want the Baby to suffer the minute he/she is born into this world. Trust me, this is the hardest decision I have to make all my life!
My hubby was actually commenting, why is Heaven treating us like this? Why bestow us with a chance to be parents but take it away even before we have the chance to realise it? In my heart, I am lamenting on that, too! How I wish I can scream out loud to Heaven and ask why why why? I can ask so many WHYs but the fact will still remain, we will have to let Baby leave. I know my Hubby is feeling terrible now. He is feeling upset over the whole thing, too. I thus told him, we are over here, grumbling, crying, lamenting, why life is so unfair to us? What about Baby? Baby does not even have the chance to open the mouth and has to go! Who is being fair to the Baby?
Baby, we are really sorry! Please trust that by choosing the abortion route is not we want. We really did try our best to preserve your life. We really did not want to give you up that easily. 'Daddy' and 'Mummy' really hate to let you go just like that. Believe me and please don't hate us. 'Daddy' and 'Mummy' really love you alot alot alot. Even your grandparents, your aunts and uncles, everyone, we really love you alot and can't bear to let you go.
When you reach to Heaven, go look for your Ah Zoh and Tiu Gong. They will look after you. Go for your reincarnation when THEY find you good parents.
Though we do not have a chance to fulfil our duty as your parents but we will love you always.
|
|
about me
further stuffs of you here |
The Fateful Day (We Do Love You, Baby) @ 4/05/2007 10:37:00 AM Don't ask me how I feel because seriously no words can really describe how I feel at this moment or even a few weeks later. I can only say that I am totally depressed to let this thing happen to me.
A week ago, I went for supposingly 'one' ultrasound scan. Not only to determine the gender of my baby where everyone is eager to know, it is also to ensure that my Baby is growing well and receiving nutrients from me. Just a single ultrasound scan leads to a total of SIX scans in total. After the first one, we naively thought we are going to have a mischevious Baby because not only we were not able to find out the gender, we are also not able to see some parts of Baby's organs as it was blocked. Never know we are so stupid! How stupid can we parents be! I guess, we just aren't fit to be parents.
After a total of SIX scans, we knew, it is not simple as A B C. Doctors gave us the worst scenario, and that is we have a very high chance of losing our BABY! NO! I cannot accept this fact! How can that be? My BABY, u know? How can anyone tell me this kind of joke! Seriously, I really do hope this is just a plain silly joke. How I wish, I can just wake up from my dream and then realise it is just one stupidiest joke I had! But I really cannot! I really cannot deceive myself as this is the truth, nothing but the truth!
Doctors advised me to have 2 weeks rest and see if the situation turns for the better. Hopefully with more rest and taking myself off stres from work, it might turn for the better. I really did some serious thinking. My unit is in fact a very small unit. I would say that we are in fact very short-handed but for the sake of my Baby, I applied a week of leave from my boss instead and do hope it turn for the better when I do my next scan.
This fateful day, 04 Apr 2007, it literally mark the end of my Baby's life! I HATE this day!
Being eager parents, we decided to follow my sister-in-law down for her appointment with my OB (She is also pregnant and we are seeing the same OB). My ultrasound scan was actually scheduled in the afternoon. I hope to have a chance to speak to my OB and see if he has anything to advise? Anything to help us, the worrying parents-to-be?
NOPE! He gave us no chance to move. His reply to me was that, for the sake of the baby, proceed for abortion before I am 24th weeks! I HATE HIM! All these while, I tell myself, even if I really have no choice but to give birth out of wedlock, I will never ever ABORT! I have always wanted a happy family picture in my life, just like my own parents. They aren't asking for anything big. Just a family with a few children of their own, a shelter above them, enough to eat, to spend everyday. A perfect life, they will call it. I am only asking for that also. To be happily married, to have my own children, to raise them and to see them grow up while I grow old. Am I asking alot? That is why, I am glad that I am blessed with this little life after we were married for not long but why is my supposingly first child to be taken away from me in such a manner.
Anyway, we have decided to heed the OB's advice. We have agreed to let the Baby leave us first even before Baby is born into the world. According to the OB, we have to be practical as bringing the Baby to the world will bring the Baby more harm. I guess as parents-to-be, we do not want the Baby to suffer the minute he/she is born into this world. Trust me, this is the hardest decision I have to make all my life!
My hubby was actually commenting, why is Heaven treating us like this? Why bestow us with a chance to be parents but take it away even before we have the chance to realise it? In my heart, I am lamenting on that, too! How I wish I can scream out loud to Heaven and ask why why why? I can ask so many WHYs but the fact will still remain, we will have to let Baby leave. I know my Hubby is feeling terrible now. He is feeling upset over the whole thing, too. I thus told him, we are over here, grumbling, crying, lamenting, why life is so unfair to us? What about Baby? Baby does not even have the chance to open the mouth and has to go! Who is being fair to the Baby?
Baby, we are really sorry! Please trust that by choosing the abortion route is not we want. We really did try our best to preserve your life. We really did not want to give you up that easily. 'Daddy' and 'Mummy' really hate to let you go just like that. Believe me and please don't hate us. 'Daddy' and 'Mummy' really love you alot alot alot. Even your grandparents, your aunts and uncles, everyone, we really love you alot and can't bear to let you go.
When you reach to Heaven, go look for your Ah Zoh and Tiu Gong. They will look after you. Go for your reincarnation when THEY find you good parents.
Though we do not have a chance to fulfil our duty as your parents but we will love you always.
|
|
freebies
if you got some stuffs you wanna share then share it here
|
credits
designer: Ms.SockPuppet
reference: detonatedlove
image: scienceishardcore
powered by: blogspot
cursor: lovecandied
|
affiliates
Those Close ones
 Baby Jayden
Almo
Terence
DarDar Huang
Yangz Avenue
Riinko
Jeremy
Mark Tay
Blogs I read
Doreamon
Esther The Gorgeous
Elaine Jerk Magnet
Ms Simplicity
Woman Of Leisure
Fann Wong
Felicia Chin
Joanna Peh
Quan Yi Fong
Bryan Wong
Dasmond Koh
Cruz Teng
Xie Jiafa
|
Learning to 'Communicate' with Baby
!! VACATION BREAK to HongKong!!
Welcome 2 TAIWAN
